Day 22. 1,485 Miles. Road To Nowhere.

There’s a city in my mind / Come along and take that ride
And it’s all right, baby it’s all right
And it’s very far away / But it’s growing day by day
And it’s all right, baby it’s all right

I think last night’s bed was way too soft, because my back and hips ache as I awaken. Blue Skies?!?! I’m up and out pretty early, passing up microwaved coffee (never that!) for a diner stop about 8 miles up. I fuel up heavy on bacon, eggs, home fries and toast. I have no planned destination for the day, just to get as many miles as I can and then pop up the palace in a discreet spot. 20 miles later and I’m at the Ohio/Pennsylvania border; trading Route 20 for Route 5. Route fucking five! I grew up on Route 5, directly across from the behemoth of wasted space that used to be the Bethlehem Lackawanna Steel Plant. Those jobs left for Florida and Arizona and then overseas long ago and the vast amount of earth is now being wastefully pieced apart.  Growing up, Route 5 was my childhood boundary line – I couldn’t wander further than that. It contained my world into both physical and psychological boxes. Now Route 5 is my direct line home. Just beyond, I get a glimpse of the mighty Lake Erie on my left… inspired by such hometown sights, I hit it harder than I’ve ever hit anything (I’m a lover not a fighter). I’ve got sunshine and clear skies, a full tank of fuel, and a TAILWIND!50 miles in before noon when I arrive into Erie, PA. My belly is still full from breakfast, but the smell of hops leads me to Lavery Brewery where an Imperial Red Ale serves as the perfect lunch, giving me even more energy. The 8.2% ABV is like fuel additive in the tank. Fantastic place. Afterward, I chill out on a park bench, feeling all the feels and thinking about how my best bitch Isis got shotgun.  I find a construction site portable toilet and I get back on the road.

Between the inspired feelings and the wide shoulder and the tailwind, I find myself ripping through the landscape. My cruising speed is literally 19 mph… I mean I’m not even breaking a sweat at that speed. When I’m pushing, I’m closer to 25 mph. With each passing moment I become more and more familiar with my surroundings. I bust the Empire State line and can feel the tax increase. The county signs start to look more familiar. My mid afternoon, I need a little protein and some water, so I stop by the visitor center at the Barcelona Lighthouse, the first lighthouse in the world to be powered by natural gas. One could say it’s been gaslighting us all since 1829.  Stepping inside, I can see the three ladies working in there are taken aback by something about me: my tattoos? my smell? I don’t know, but they don’t like me. When I ask for a restroom, the point me down to the harbor – a long winding downhill. Meh. I literally just don’t want to piss on the tree outside with all the tourists poking around outside. Plus the wind means I might piss on myself.

For fear of being rejected twice, I fill my water bottle without asking, chug, and then do it again. Then the topic of my long bike ride comes out, and they ease back a bit. They ask me to sign the guestlist. They ask me where I live. One of the women lived in Buffalo her whole life and she moved down here just under a decade ago. A really nice lady, she’s going on and on about how so much is going on in Buffalo since her and her husband sold their Parkside home. She wants to take a week or two and go up there to do all the cool things her girlfriends are talking about, “Let’s see… Larkinville, and… Hotel Henry, and… oh yeah… Slow Roll, we’ve gotta do the Slow Roll!” Ding ding ding! Me: “I’m the founder of Slow Roll”. Her: “Really?! Wow! It’s all I hear about, I want to do one so badly, but I have so many questions.” I give her all the answers she can handle. Before I know it, the restroom in the next room becomes available to me. “We’re not gonna make you go all the way down there.” I thank them and promise not to make a mess. Thank you, community bike ride for warming hearts and minds and getting me an indoor toilet and sink on windy day.

Around Dunkirk I start pondering sleeping locations. Maybe the city park there. Maybe behind the Firemen’s association building in Silver Creek. The familiarity of these places make this whole process less of a concern – so instead, I just keep riding. Same tailwind, same weather, same speed. Eventually, I realize I’m only 40 miles from home! My own bed? Fuck it, lets go!!!

I roll up into Silver Creek and suddenly the skies in front of me are ominous AF. Dark clouds gotta mean something. But Buffalo is forecast to be sunny all day. What the fuck? I’m moving through Seneca Nation territory (I still haven’t figured out why they’ve embraced the misnomer “Indian” so much. I mean if you’re ok with being incorrectly labeled by historically inaccurate white men, why not go all in and use the word “Injun”?) Seriously though, In the last 1,400 miles I’ve crossed the Trail of Tears and passed enough Andrew Jackson (fuck that cracker ass cracker) dedicated-locations on this trip to freely state that we should Honor Indian Treaties and all go back to that way of life.  The world would be way less fucked.  Anyway, the skies open up and it dumps rain on me. Gimme a break, Nell Carter – who did the motherfuckin’ rain dance? I lose the tailwinds, I lose the sunshine, but I don’t lose the motivation. I push on and at Evans, the rain stops, the sun comes back out, and the roads here are dry. So I guess it only rains on Native American Land. Someone blame Obama.
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Evans, Angola, Derby, Lakeview, Wanakah. My energy is depleted, my legs are noodles, but the familiarity of these places keeps me moving forward. I turn the corner and see the skyline across the lake, right across from where I went to high school. 

I push on, the sun is setting, but I get the 140 daily miles needed to reach my memory foam mattress. At which point I black out on the entire world into the best sleep of my life, at least until the next one.

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Isis got shotgun

If you’re new here, don’t fret. This isn’t about how I’m some Islamic fundamentalist with a sawed-off coming to take your Drumpf-given rights. In fact I’m not much for organized religions nor firearms. But I am about love. And dogs. This is about a dog a love.

When I bought my first house, I then got a dog. I found this pup on Elmwood and Hodge in Buffalo when she was 5 or 6 weeks old. She fit in the palm of my hand. I gave the 12 year old kid selling puppies $50 and some hip hop CDs and my new home had a door bell whilst I (along with a preverbal tribe of misfits) got the best friend any human could conceive. An almost all black mutt, we named her Isis, after a mythological goddess. I’ve actually blogged about her years ago, and this post would be way too long if I went anymore in depth about her bawesome-ness.

Isis (my phone requires 5 tries to type that word) lived the best 16 years you could give a living thing and 15.5 of it was active and amazing. I ended her suffering on February 1st 2018, but a piece of her has been with me for every mile of this journey. Some of her remains are this vial and zip tied right up front for the best view possible. A fantastic running partner, I’ve imagined her sprinting alongside me on the Natchez Trace, her tongue hanging out and her eyes looking at me like, “yo dawg, when the fuck are we gonna take a break?” What an emotional rush that was. It get very real in the time and place. It’s happened several times since then and each time the tears give me nothing but strength. I’m so thankful she could be there in that moment and riding shotty the entire time.

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Day 21. 1,347 Miles. Fording the Fire.

Yesterday’s “getting my feet wet” was literally the getting my feet wet of getting my feet wet today. Also, I’ve somehow teleported to the center of the world, wherever the hell that is.

I wake up before sunrise, my belly still at capacity from the massive mealI enjoyed the night before. It’s raining again and I so I leisurely enjoy coffee with Doug and Jena. The rain subsides and I thank them for their hospitality and I hit the road, about an hour later than normal. Just a mile or two in and I’m greeted by what has become a very familiar sight the last week:

Road closed. I am not interested playing this game of detours today. I take my shoes and socks off and the next moment I’m barefoot fording through the overflowing of a river that once caught fire. It’s up to my thighs at a certain point, and fish swim by. I lift my 100 pounds of bike and gear and really wish I had eaten that last piece of short rib I forgot in Doug’s refrigerator. Ohio has been getting pounded with rain and this is just one of many flooding instances I’ve encountered – but the first I’ve been able to directly overcome with detouring. I get to the other side, get redressed and get moving on, but that would just be the start of it the wetness.

After a short rail trail, I’m on a state highway for about 20 miles into Warren. After mile one the rains come down. It’s get pretty heavy, so I stop to put my rain jacket on and sip some of the fantastic coffee my thermos was so generously filled with by my hosts. And then as I roll out the rain stops, of course.

That’s when I realize I am in the center of the world. How do I know? Telepathy? Cosmic enlightenment? Fulfillment of my chi? Nope. There’s just a sign letting me me know. Funny, I figured the center of the world wouldn’t need a sign. What do I know?!

I decide to take a little breakfast break on a bench over looking whatever it is that’s now flooded out here in the center of the world. Predictably as soon as I get my rain jacket off it starts to rain again. I retreat under a little coverage and drink more coffee – my final rail trail of this tour is just a couple miles away.The rain lets up again so I hit the Case Western Greenway Trail. This beauty is a 30+ mile, magnificently flat rail trail cutting through absolute wilderness. There are no stations, few stops and zero coverage. Perfect for my impending condition. I’m not into golden showers, but Mother Nature is the only one I’m ok with pissing all over me. She is into some kinky shit. And damn was she one hydrated lady today (let’s call that a hydrady, just because). She comes down on me in buckets. Cats and dogs. On some why didn’t someone tell me to build an ark type shit. My watch app cuts off Sly & The Family Stone and sounds the alarm that there is a flash food warning. No shit Sherlock. As I’ve stated, there’s no cover on this trail, so here I am, going 16 mph for 2-3 hours in a never-ending downpour. The flooding rises all around me, my feet are soaked, my entire body is soaked. It’s as if I had gone swimming in that river I crossed earlier. Water from below. Water from above. Water sideways. Water. Water. Water. All I can hear is Denzel Washington in Training Day telling Ethan Hawke, “I didn’t know you liked to get wet.” I try my damnedest to not hit frogs and snakes and chipmunks out playing in the monsoon.

After 3 hours of absolutely drenching rains, I get to a little town and the rain lets up, so I decide to grab a refreshment in the store and hang on their picnic tables out front. Jokes on me, as soon as I come out of the store, the rain returns as strong as before. I ditch that idea, connect on somewhere dry to sleep and head in that direction.

Rick is retired from the Air Force and has a great little home he’s gonna let me spend the night at. As I enter his town the sign says “Saybrook: Pleasant. Planned. Progressive.” Cool. This is a quaint little town, even it’s still pouring. Exhausted, I finally get there, get dry, eat some ramen. And crash like the stock market on Black Monday.

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