Day 6. 366 Miles. 7 Star Accommodation.

Stocked up on food, I’m loading up the retrieved Sojourn outside of the shop while Sandpaper chats the owner up over a beer inside. Clouds and a light rain provide an ideal sunscreen and a welcome drop in temperature – though the humidity clearly doesn’t know when to leave the party. It’s a 3 mile bike path ride to the Trace and then 6 riding days of open road and zero capitalism mucking up my outdoor enjoyment. (Can we start calling them “cappies” yet?) SP and I do our bon voyage things and I get about 1 mile when the skies open up. This is where showers become storms.

I pull off to a covered area to drink some coffee. After 10-15 minutes the downpour subsides back into showers and I pop on my raincoat. I love riding in the rain. For some reason we lose this love as adults but almost all kids loved playing the rain. Riding in the rain puts me into a nice “here’s where I am, I’m doing what I do” mentality. There is no option to not ride, I’ve gotta get where I’m going.

Five miles and the showers further subside to scattered rain drops. Nice medium size ones that cool me off but not so big that get into my eyes. Perfect! After 20 miles I stop for a little lunch and the remove my raincoat, which is more wet with sweat than rain. Then I rock out a 40 mile stretch without a single stop to put my foot down. Whew!

Rolling up to the Kosciusko visitor center, I’m exhausted and looking for water. The Parkway map indicates this is a bike only campground and the signs back this up. You don’t see many of these except out west or overseas, so i like to utilize them when I can.

I walk into the center/museum and speak with the two helpful gents working there. Not only do I find out the bathrooms will be left unlocked for me, but that I can pop my tent right up on the front or back porch of the center. Taking cover!

Even the bathroom stall door has bicycles on it. They got a “Safety Guidelines for Motorists” brochure that starts with “bicycles are considered vehicles, and bicyclists have he same rights and responsibilities as motorists. Please treat cyclists with the same courtesy as you would another vehicle.” Hell yeah! It even instructs against blowing your horn because it can cause a loss of balance and possibly an accident. You reading this, lucky number 13?

I also get some great tidbits of knowledge: like the fact that the Natchez Trace is the most visited National Park (journey-oriented, rather than destination-oriented). I do the water in-water out thing and meander around the small museum. Taddeus Kosciusko was a distinguished military man from Poland who aided the USA during the revolutionary war. For this service they named a town in Mississippi (and a street in Buffalo) after him. Oddly, the town Kosciusko (“kozzy-esko”) is pronounced differently than the pronunciation of the man’s actual name (“ko-shue-skoh”). What gives?! If you name a fucking town after me, you better damn well pronounce my name the way it’s pronounced. Nothing but empathy for old Taddeus on this one.

I cook up some Ramen, pop up the palace and climb in as the skies simply open up. It pours all night, so I sure I’m grateful for my seven star accommodations here in Kosciusko – Airbnb ain’t got shit on this.

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Day 5. 307 Miles. No Reverse.

I’m cruising around the mean streets of Jackson Mississippi – riding bitch on the front bench of a pickup truck that – I shit you not – cannot go in reverse. There’s a whole lot of neutral backward downhill going on. But I love the metaphoricalistic juxtaposition of a forward-only motor vehicle and the bicycle I’m riding.

I wake up bright and early; get my campground coffee/pack-up/poop knocked out; and I’m on the road. Shoutout to Run the Jewels and the White Stripes on today’s playlists. From the campground, I’ve got my one (and hopefully only) stop off of this fabulous Parkway about 60 miles up in Jackson. I want to have my repairs double checked, I need to restock on food, and I hope to catch up with some friends living in Mississippi’s capital. The WNY diaspora goes wide and far!

It’s still hot and humid as balls, so I’m fixin’ to get these 60 miles in before 1pm. I get into top gear and keep momentum going. I’m making great time with just a couple fun stops along the way. Still very little traffic, historical tidbits, and amazing wild life everywhere you look. Butt.

Traffic on the Trace picks up as I get closer to Jackson and I’m not looking forward to the road-condition-and-traffic-volume knuckleball likely on its way into my peace and quiet. So, I find a bike shop located right off of the Trace and, as it turns out, not only do they sell beer but they need me to leave my bike with them – which is when I buy a beer and then call Sandpaper. The guvmint calls him Chris, and is one of my coolest pals on earf. We go back and the background gets eloquently summed up by his funky fresh fridge magnet.

Sandpaper informs me that he can swing by the bike shop to pick me up AND that I can stay in his and his better half Lacy’s spare room. Avoiding suburban traffic + getting a shower + doing some laundry = a big ole fat win on tour.

But we’ve only just begun, Jimmy Castor: Two hours later and I’m drinking a beer at a bar inside of a Whole Foods, which still doesn’t sound right as I type it. Four hours later and they’ve got 3 fun dogs! Six hours later and it’s taco motherfucking Tuesday at the local Mexican spot with Lacy’s bandmate Bobbie. I crush five fantastic tacos and it’s reminiscent of a visit I paid earlier this year to Mexico City – where tacos cost 30 cents each and i feasted on 30 of them in 3 days. Jackson Mississippi definitely ain’t no Ciudad de Mexico, but it did beat out Jackson Louisiana, barely. Our seventh president would be so conflicted and he should be.

A great night with great people. Tomorrow I pick up my bike and push on up through the deep middle of the state.

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Day 4. 258 Miles. No DeLoreans, no phone booths, no hot tubs.

Picture this: Theodore Roosevelt travels through time on a Fat Tire Bicycle and brings Frederick Law Olmsted and Fred Hampton to the present day and together they make America a better place by cutting the President’s, Congress’, and the Supreme Court’s salaries by 70% – all as a means to finance completing and maintaining a system of National Parkways; connecting our broad ass motherfucking nation’s communities in truly meaningful ways. Maybe call it a “trail of traces” or “trace of trails”? Whichever Ted and Fred and Fred prefer at this point in the book and then poorly adapted film. What’s the sequel gonna be about anyway? Maybe we can get George Washington, Bruce Lee and Lisa Left Eye Lopes to buddy cop it up on a mission to fix schools and hospitals and bridges! šŸ˜‚

I’m now at Rocky Springs campground. Someone left a hot coal amongst a pile of trash they barely burned off, so I’ll be “leaving it better than I found it” as I think I they now say. Still, Captain Caveman voice would be like, ā€œLow smoky fire keep away gnats flies ticks.ā€ Hell, it’s the only way I can be out with all these bugs and type this blog bloggy blog out. (If you’re keeping count at home, score one for šŸ”„). But all this is just the right now…

Traveling back in time to when I wake up in the seediest hotel room in Natchez Mississippi. The dog now clearly working reception is cute and attentive, but doesn’t seem to wanna take my key card back. A human finally shows – and I break the fuck out. Turns out the gas station next to the not-yet-open-only-bike-shop-in-town’s coffee is fantastic. No shit. I go with the BOLD variety over the ADDICT variety. Things look up as a I hit the bike shop, fingers crossed that I can get the repairs I need.

A couple hours later I’ve made some new friends and I’m rolling out of Trippe’s Western Auto with a new spoke and tube and in a few short miles, I’m On the Trace!. I’ve got a 60+ mile ride up through nothing but nature and history to a campground that may or may not have water – and it really doesn’t matter because this stretch is rare heavenly biking bliss in all it’s uni-corny glory. (SWIDT?). If I’m keeping count (and I am), there are 0 potholes and only 29* motor vehicles pass me today. In 60 miles. Something like one vehicle every eight to nine minutes! Nothing to stop and buy, and motorists are told via explicit signage to change lanes while passing me. I count 5 such signs. Sweet nature-bike-vana. I might need an extra wet nap shower with all the moistness.

A lone asshole in an RV (i call them lucky 13) beeps at me and only moves halfway over to pass – the only instance of anything like that all day. Still – even if it’s a friendly beep – why don’t you understand that I can hear your engine a quarter mile coming and I don’t need that? A bit of an asshole for sure, but no sepsis or diarrhea or anything too nasty – so I smile and wave at number thirteen as it speeds off, well over the 50 mph parkway limit.

Speaking of which, this is a National Park(way) right? Where are the Federales collecting the papeles on all that illegal rapido? Where’s America’s version of those loony loving Mounties, eh? Turns out (other than the road condition) all of this is severely underfunded. I can’t even determine how long it’s been in disrepair. Sites are closed, bathrooms are broken down, bulletin boards are shuddered. Some of it looks like its been since the 80s or 90s some looks like its been just the last couple years.

It’s me against the insect world of Mississippi as I look over a copy of the parkway map. I’ve got a long stretch of Mississippi and then Alabama and Tennessee ahead of me. I’d like to get off the Trace as little as possible and I’m thinking tomorrow in Jackson would be a good place to stock up on food. I meet Jay and his dad – they’re from North Carolina and are biking up the Trace as well. Awesome father and son activity if I do say so myself. We chat a bit and I’m pretty sure I’ll see more of them down the 440 something mile road.

It finally cools off a bit so I’m no longer sweating all over myself naked in my tent. I take another wet wipe shower and put on cotton underwear. All I hear are wild animals calling to each about sex or something or other. Maybe my avocado on the table. No generator noise. No motor vehicle noise. The occasional overhead airplane is a cool version of white noise as I doze off under the stars.

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